Thursday, June 24, 2010

Relaxation, Mosquito Nets and Re-evaluation of It All..

It's been a while since I last posted, again. /sigh/ What can I say, it's the summer? :)
Meanwhile, Slovenia beat Algeria, almost beat the USA and well - the UK won the other day! (It was too depressing to watch the bad game so I talked to the beekeeper neighbour instead! He told me some cool things!:)
Mind you, I am NOT a football fan, but if Sis and Granny both watched-?? It was a great game, 1st half od SLO:USA game, then I just lost interest lol!
Lots of bees came to drink from a barrel at our house, it was quite interesting.. The neighbour said he thinks bees know if something is toxic and avoid it, I'm not so sure myself..?

We didn't have the eco stand then after all - the event was 'double booked', some kids that would like to partake had a concert on the same day and couldn't, some were not so very much into eco things (or would need to be inspired more!) It was the end of the year...?

Apparently the shop took off the posters we had on the 1st eco stand when cleaning and they disappeared :( we also didn't have any good promo materials anymore (hopefully we'd manage to get or make more during the autumn/winter!) - and I got ill..

No surprise, since everything was quite hectic!
The potatoes needed de-weeding, and as I'm not such a fast expert (yet?) it took a while, basically the whole week, just at the time when we could practise with the kids! - It's not easy to be a wanna-be farmer and eco activist at the same time, sometimes!! I was hugely disappointed with myself! (for not setting it all up better, or earlier on, or getting other people on board to help before!) All the teachers and kindergarten teachers I know were busy with things this time of year too!!(I had no idea I wouldn't have time either!!)

It's all volunteering and goodwill at this time, so basically, who cares?
I do not wonder anymore why the government hasn't done something like that yet - grassroots campaigns etc, raising awareness at local levels - it seems to take talking to a lot of people and well, it's much easier to just build something than do these things!

Still, partly it was a success - creating together with two not-so-eco moms opened up opportunity for discussing eco things (without preaching!) and we had fun too! (One has written an eco song, she sings beautifully! I hope I'll get her to finish it and record it!) And some kids WERE interested! (I just didn't have enough reliable ones to carry the show!) It rained on the day, anyway! (The event still went ahead, but I hear there were not many people/visitors...) So, hopefully we'll create something later on! It would be GREAT to have a team of people who could jump in instead of me if I'm too busy or ill or something...

Partly, I feel burnt out... Part of me just wanted to jump on a plane and go to a totally different part of the world, maybe that is just escapism?
It's very annoying that some people I talked to (and a book by an eco biz expert!) all said that it's better to do things for free/without outside money at first, and later on (maybe next year) apply for EU funding or such.

It's annoying to know a lot of people (and non-profits) do get huge amounts of money for way worse projects than these!! And since I was warned project theft occurs, it's difficult to know who to trust... and to what degree.. (And since we renovated, where are some e-mail addresses I apparently misplaced??)
I think I lost some of the drive and motivation, or maybe it's just the summer? I do hope to get them back!!

My family want me to start earning money with the eco things asap!! Or at least to not lose money with these things! Dad is quite against the eco projects as he sees it as 'nagging' and 'obstruction' and 'slowing things down' - probably does not fancy women butting into men's domains like building and renovation??

I see it as perfect opportunity to educate, inform and inspire suppliers, merchants and manufacturers too.. I have shocked a few sales people when I asked what the window shutters and anti-mosquito nets are made of and if they can be fully recycled lol!!

Dad and Sis just want it done 'as soon as possible'! And I admit for a week it was too hot to research and then I got ill, oh dear.. Better already, hope it all clears soon.. Was wondering whether to try to get a (home) office away from home though, to minimize distraction... I'm officially ill so this minimizes distraction, still the renovations or farm/garden work are somewhat unpredictable.. And I still hate housekeeping, both cooking and dishwashing.. I tried my best last year, but then Dad just asked 'Why are you trying to be a good housekeeper?' (when I was trying to go zero waste) and he didn't appreciate it at all!! (He wants me to get a hotshot job/career and get married and give him grandkids!)
Granny thinks Dad may have onset of Alzheimers too (?) I thought maybe ADD/ADHD.. He didn't know the other day what a gardening concept meant that he taught us!! It hasn't been easy... :( He's behaving now that I was ill but I don't want to have peace only when I'm ill-??

So, I'm still figuring out my options, and hopefully I'll hear about some short-term funding opportunities soon too?
I wrote up some good eco programs/plans, and they could probably get funding too.. And now people just want me to do it all for free? hmm?
It seems I got pulled up too much into the pro bono/volunteer stuff and forgot to work on the profit centers/moneymaking.. I understand my parents too, it seems difficult to clone myself and do two or three different things at a time..

While resting, I read some good books ordered from Bookdepository, on time management and organizing etc.. Some things were quite helpful. I may do some reviews later on.

I did take some pics of the balcony, not sure how wise it is to put it online, color is very specific and I'd prefer to stay a bit incognito? We'll see.. :) Still have 2 balcony windows to paint, it was raining meanwhile and the wood needs to be dry for painting with tung oil too..


  1. Gosh you've been a busy bee! Hope you've been taking some time to relax and enjoy the summer too!

    I'm so glad some of your efforts have been successful - I like the sound of that eco song! And I hope whoever's in charge of giving grants is sensible and gives you some money to do your projects - you deserve it! I know how much hard work it is to start grassroots/community action and sustain it (which is why I had to stop mine (when I did animal rights stuff) it was too stressful!) and if you're going to dedicate a big portion of your time to it then you need some pennies!

    My family sometimes don't appreciate taking being eco-friendly into account in what we consume - I find it's more stressful if we're trying to do something in a rush, but if I know we need something and have time then I try to do my research on it before hand, then mention it a couple of times before we need to buy whateveritis so the idea's already in my mums head before we set out! It's hard though and my psychological tricks don't always work!

  2. Sooz, you give great tips!

    The rush is what is soo stressful for me too - my family is like that - a rush, then nothing for two weeks (and I don't even know if they ordered the things or not? Does it still pay off to research any or not?) and then a rush again.. very stressful! I find if I use good arguments (mostly of financial nature lol! eg how much we could save or what damages and costs we could avoid with something) they usually listen - but this can backfire - see my new post! /sigh/

    I did take some time to relax, I feel quite guilty lol.. Still have some things to do, it's so hot in here though.. (and AC is not eco?)

    Well, everybody said it's better to go for grants next year, so not sure.. will have to go for other sources of funding, ideally would be independent from any grants or such anyway, the paperwork can be a lot of hassle (the reports etc then... different with different grants though..)

    Anyway, hoping you're having a great summer!!